Wednesday, 22 January 2014

Bent , but not broken

That devil's night, with thundering clouds and flashing lightning
I wishes the world may end
For down with rainfall, swept the expectations
And the etiquette cherished since generations
Strewn were the melodies which achievements composed
Never expected that to the brutal truth, would I be so suddenly exposed
Those bombarding questions and endless curiosities
Weakened my remaining strength
Nothing serious but simply that the saplings
Wished to sprout in a land away from the "old tree"
Had no chance but to let them go
Love lost to obsession
They left me to face the strong words
With shivering trunk and quivering branches
I stand on this vast island with hope as my only friend
Though discarded and shattered
I am bent out, not broken

Tuesday, 14 January 2014

Requiem

There he lay before me
Silent, serene in the adorned coffin
Smiling on his sleep, did he seem to me
Adorable, charming my companion
Flashed through my mind the days
when we were happy
I remember those fun filled days
when I was sad, dull and in despair
He said to me, one day you will succeed
Everyone, near and far he used to care
Almighty! please bring him back I plead
He understood everyone
And loved them all
Now that you have left me, who will be there for me
Please don't leave me, from you I can never part
But alas! you have left me
I guess people like you and me are easily parted

Thursday, 8 August 2013

WISH

I wish I could drift gently with the clouds
or fall swiftly as little rain drops
or come gushing down the mountains huge and tall
and spark on the rocks like a waterfall

I wish I could move with the waves of the deep blue ocean
To wash the shore and recede, just to keep returning again

I wish I could blow like the cool breeze
over valleys, plains and high mountain peaks.

I wish I could rustle with the leaves
of the beautiful green trees, creating music pleasant and sweet

I wish I could fly high in the sky like a bird
or swim like a fish and touch the ocean ground

I know I will myself remain myself
For I am created with a different purpose
It may be to bring a smile on the face
of someone whom I love or who needs help
and I will also, not just enjoy
but preserve the beauty of our world

Tuesday, 22 January 2013

When a baby is born, A mother is born!!!!

It was in April12th 2008 that I knew i am carrying!!! It was one of the most happiest day of our lives.  We were at bangalore. The first person I called was my mother. She was overwhelmed with joy.. we talked for almost an hour.Me and Renju didnt sleep that time. we were busy with our mobiles calling our dear ones to let them know about our good news!!!Soon after a week, I started developing all morning sickness, suffered a lott..

After a month, had the first scan and my doctor advised me to take bed rest as there was some issue with my health. Without a second thought, i quit my job and returned home.Then month wise check ups, scans,tensions, excitement.... whenever i go to doctor she makes me hear baby's heartbeat.. i always enjoyed it and as she was my father's colleague, i used to make her repeat it again and again. I was due on december 26th, scan report always said so. But my doctor asked me to get admitted on dec 10th 2008. I was full of tension like all in that situation and finally on dec 12th as i developed less pain, doctor aunty went for ceserean. After 4 hours or so I became conscious and was eager to see my child.



Then there she came, wrapped in a white cloth. she was brought to me by sushma sister. As i was not supposed to get up,she sat near me with baby so that I can see her nicely. I forgot to ask whether its a boy or girl. I have never taken such small babies ever but I dont know how i had the courage to hold her.I think my eagerness outweighed my fearness. She was sleeping. Very peacefully... :-). I could not take my eyes off her. She used to cry a lot at night during the first 3 months and we both never slept those days. Someimes I used to get worried about her continous crying and I used to wake up my father and he always advises me not to be over concerned about it.



After 5-6 months, all advised and some even scolded me for not joining back to my career. But I could not leave my daughter for a moment, I was sure of that. I didnt pay attention to their words and went on. I knew that these days of her, she needed the utmost care and I know no one except me can give her that to the fullest. I was happy with it and I am still proud to have spent those days with her. As I was with her on all her stages, I know the dates of each of her stage. On may 27th 2009 she had her first roll and by june mid came the teeth. :-) she started crawling on oct 8th 2009 and walked steadily on june 23rd 2010. I was always very particular about the important dates in my life, I always wanted to know the dates of each of my baby's stages. If I had gone to work , I am sure I would have missed all these dates. Thank God that I didnt change my mind. :-)



After we celebrated her 3rd birthday , I joined back my career and she stays at daycare in the day time. It was difficult for both of us to stay apart even for a few hours. Now shes 3.6yrs. and very happy to go to play school. She talks non-stop now, knows to write 3-4 alphabets,combs her hair very well, dresses up nicely. she had started developing her own style and last day she demanded for a mobile so that in the evening if I am not able to leave office in time to pick her, I can call her and tell her to wait. When I scold for her naughty deeds, she makes me sad with her senti dialogues and when I say sorry for scolding, she laughs at me and tells me that she was acting. She likes movie songs and when she sings some of them with her own lyrics, i feel soo happy and surpirsed!!! Now her fav number is ammaayi song of a malayalam movie.... Today she told me that she wants to wear a churidhar and that too with a shawl. Now I feel time is flying and so I prefer to spent most of my time with her. When shes in a good mood, she helps to arranges veggies in the fridge and helps me in hanging wet clothes. Still she needs me to tell stories at night and wants me to be with her when she sleeps. When I get tensed for some reason, she comes to me and tells me "chammanapedu amme"!!! You dint get that word.. samaadhaanapedu amme!! :-)

Feels very proud to have a daughter like her... :-)